I figured it out!
Up until yesterday I refused to eat chickpeas. They are simply not good. Bland. Gritty? Uninteresting.
However, part of this blog journey that I’m on is inspired to find a way to learn to love even the most lifeless of fare. Jeffrey Steingarten remarks in his eloquent food narrative, The Man Who Ate Everything, “I succeeded in purging myself of nearly all repulsions and preferences, in becoming a more perfect omnivore.” I too, thirst for this end.
An omnipotent omnivore. An epicurean of all cuisines. A global gourmand.
Just so you know, there are a few food items that really ought not to exist (in my radically superior opinion) I.E.:
- chickpeas (as stated above)
- yellow summer squash (tastes like actual vomit)
- mint (unless you are a toothpaste, tea or gum)
- kettle corn (sweet popcorn? why?)
- and most triumphantly the dreaded chicken salad.
Just now I was standing in my kitchen eating a mediocre piece of grilled lemon pepper chicken. Thrilling, I know. Well, it might be if you are Glob, the blog dog.
But anyway. It got me thinking, how is one of my favorite foods also one of my least favorite foods, spending the majority of its time hanging out somewhere in the barely edible category? I speak (of course) of said chicken. I’m locked in a poultry purgatory, if you will.
Fried chicken is on my “last meal” menu. And yet, I would sooner starve than eat gloppy, lumpy chicken salad.
What is it? A texture thing? Maybe. A flavor thing? Almost always.
And who in the sam hill thought it was a good idea to put in dried cranberries and cashews (ugh, the worst of all the nuts) in there??? I want to puke.
“Oh yes! More fruitcake covered in mayonnaise along with four day old bird, please.”
I’m not discriminating, I’ve tried many; curry chicken salad, heavy on the mayo, baked, grilled, boiled etc.
There is an Italian tuna salad made by my mafioso-esque stepfather in which he uses good olive oil, briny capers and fresh herbs (delicious) – but put that into chicken salad and you might as well be eating cat food.* No. Me. Gusta.
When it comes to eating I’m not much on moderation. If it’s going in me, I want it to be fantastic…otherwise whats the point?
So why did chicken get this middle of the road reputation? Maybe that’s why he tried to cross the damn thing in the first place.
Or maybe because it’s safe, abundant, cheap, versatile, etc.
I don’t know.
But I’m not keen on this intermediate scenario. So I have an idea, No! It’s more of a challenge…Will you send in recipes to make me a convert? I can’t stand the thought of confrontation with this painstakingly overused degradation of fowl. I need to rejoice in humanity that there is a delicious version of this plucking meal.
Can someone make me like chicken salad??
There is no recipe here for chicken salad because I detest chicken salad. (See above.)
I really digress. This is not a post about chicken. But it is a post about chicks – chickpeas to be precise. A nominal bean imposter composed of wasted calories and canned joylessness.
Back to the matter at hand…
So…What did I do, you ask? – In attempts to get in this jubilant juxtaposition in the geniality of the great garbanzo??
I fried it!
I mixed it with red pepper flakes, garlic, a bunch of herbs and couscous…And while I’m still queasy in the ‘chick’ salad department…I’ve done a total 180 with that frivolous, little ‘chick’ pea.
Feeds 4; Takes about an hour
Ingredients for Crispy Chickpea Couscous
- 1 and 1/3 cup dried couscous
- 2 cups Chicken Stock
- 1/3 red onion, small dice
- 1/3 cup kalamata olives, pitted and roughly chopped
- 1/2 cup good feta, in brine, cut into bite size chunks
- 4 tbsp corn starch
- 1 can chickpeas, rinsed and patted dry thoroughly
- 2 tsp red pepper flakes
- 5 cloves garlic, peeled and left whole
- 1 large handful parsley, chopped
- 1 large handful basil, chopped
- Avo oil, salt and pepper
Ingredients/Method for Lemon Dressing
- Juice of 1/2 lemon
- 4 tbsp avocado oil
- 2 tbsp good olive oil
- large pinch of salt
Combine and whisk all ingredients. Refrigerate for later use.
Ingredients/Method for Lemon Cream
- Juice of 1/2 lemon
- 1/3 cup full fat sour cream
- 1 tbsp half and half
Combine, whisk and taste. Refrigerate.
Ingredients/Method for Kebabs (to serve with:)
- 2 fresh chicken breasts, cut into large chunks
- Zest and juice of 2 lemons
- 1 1/2 cups sweet cherry tomatoes
- 2 small zucchini, chopped in 1 inch rounds
- Olive oil, Salt
Mix chicken with lemon zest and juice, a glug of olive oil and salt in a large bowl and refrigerate to marinate (at least 2 hours). When ready to eat, skewer chicken on kebabs and same with tomatoes and zucchini.
I like to skewer them according to ingredient, because the tomatoes take less time to cook.
Give a brush of oil and salt and grill on medium, flipping with tongs often. Chicken will take 12-15 min. Zucchini takes 10 min. Tomatoes take 7-8 min.
Method for Crispy Chickpea CousCous
Bread the feta cubes in cornstarch, brushing off excess.
Add 2 tbsp avocado oil to a nonstick pan and heat to medium. Fry feta cubes flipping about 2x until golden. This takes about 4 min. Set aside.
Keep same pan hot and add a bit of oil if needed.
Dredge chickpeas in the rest of the corn starch and fry for 1-2 min. Make sure to watch these and don’t cook too hot. Add garlic, red pepper flakes and salt. Cook for about 5-7 min total, until crispy and gold.
If you haven’t already cooked the kebabs, now would be a good time to light the grill and start them.
Meanwhile, cook couscous according to package instructions (but allowing to brown slightly in olive oil before adding stock).
Add chicken stock to couscous (not water).
Once done, fluff the couscous with a fork. Add olives, herbs, feta and chickpeas. Taste and season as you like.
Serve with kebabs, lemon dressing and lemon cream.
* A few years back when I was on vacation in Cabo with my parents, (and long before it dawned on me to learn Spanish) I went in a little market near our resort looking for some snacks, including tuna. Upon returning, I took a little side jaunt to the pool to eat my Mexican ‘tuna salad’ in peace, only to be told by Tony (the bilingual pool boy) that I was eating cat food. I’m now embracing technologies like Duo Lingo.
Looking for some more delicious ways to eat chickpeas? I’m working on it.
Looking for some delicious ways to eat chicken? I got you. Try Taco Friday! Or Winter Salad with Charred Radicchio and Ricotta. Yum. Ooh or Rigatoni with Drunken Pepper Sauce and Chicken Sausage…I could go on…shall I? Ok, how about Truffle Cauliflower with Fried Chicken & Hot Hot Honey or Chicken & Mushrooms in Convert Gravy?
