Don’t look at that picture. We will get to that later. Right now, I need answers.
Tell me please! Ease my ever fogging mind. Let me get a grasp on this far fledged notion that banes my seemingly every thought.
Why? WHY do pregnant women go to Hawaii???? HA-WHY?? (I kill myself)
It makes no logical sense. I remember being in Maui a few years ago and there was a cult following of pregos. Hundreds of them. In restaurants, out shopping, they roam the beaches, with their moderately exposed mid sections. They were everywhere. But let me ask you one more time…WHY??
Before you answer. Allow me to legitimize my argument. It’s worth mentioning that I speak from a place of logistical concern. I’m not talking the pandemic talk or walking the six foot shuffle. I’m talking about deep, seething, imbedded, empathetic concern.
As you may or may not know (or care) I am now ‘with child’. Nearly 7 months in, and I TOO, dream of being deleteriously slathered in sunshine and sea foam. I TOO would love to be dropping the Amex on hilarious and preposterously priced island wear. I TOO, understand the draw!
But wait.
You are telling me that you would fly hours upon hours, over a turbulent ocean to landlock yourself in a commune of exquisitely fresh sushi and mai tais — of which you can’t partake?? Not a great choice.
What kind of masochist movement are you following??
Watching your husband take bite after sickeningly sweet bite of fatty toro or king kampachi caught this morning…You, my fare weather friend are a glutton for punishment! (Little food joke there)
Revering in the saturated tequila sunrise lingering on a strangers lips?! No thanks.
Wanna go for scuba? WRONG. Just another thing you can’t do. Breathing seems to be something of a delicacy these days (for many reasons).
There you are. Waddling through the crowds of imploring poke stands. Smell that? Not for you. Hands off lady.
The only foreseeable way this makes sense is if you abstain from alcohol and the fantasy that is eating platefuls of raw, slippery, oceanic resplendence. (And in that case, I very much doubt you would be reading this blog).
So, now what? No booze. No Fish. No deep sea hobnobbing with the Great Whites. Get yourself an açaí bowl and think about the bad choices you’ve made.
I’ll be booking flights to Hawaii after the 10 month haul* – Me, the Cuban and our sweet, little sushi grade parasite who already has a very discerning palate.
If you happen to be in Maui, I might recommend Island Vintage Coffee Company. It was my go to spot 8 days in a row.
If you say, “Hey! We’re at least a 6+ hr flight from that pacific archipelago in the sun”. Fear not! That doesn’t mean we can’t have some of tropics brought to us.
It goes without saying (or arguing) The Wellness Tree in Eastern WA offers some awesome berry bowls, fresh juices and smoothies. Any choice you make here, you undeniably won’t regret.
Don’t live in Spokane or Maui? Also, not a problem. You can make my version (in like 5 minutes).
Takes 5 mins, like I said; Feeds 2 and a little dumpling
Method and Ingredients for Peach and Banana Açaí Bowl with Golden Kiwi and Coconut (that’s a mouthful) – of flavor
- 3 extra ripe bananas
- 2 ripe peaches, sliced**
- 2 packages frozen açaí packets
- 2 cups plain, full fat Greek yogurt
- 1/3 milk (I used whole)
- 1/2 cup raspberry granola
- 2 golden kiwis, sliced
- 4 tbsp unsweetened coconut flakes
- 2 tsp chia seeds
- 3 tbsp WA state honey (or your fav), divided
Add bananas, peaches, açaí, yogurt and milk to your food processor or blender. Blend on med high for 2 minutes, until well incorporated.
Taste.
Scoop into individual bowls and top with remaining ingredients.
** Feel free to use frozen fruit instead of fresh here. It will also make the consistency a bit thicker, which may be desirable.
More fruit and ‘power’ bowls coming your way soon. In the meantime, shake it up a bit – add peanut butter, use coconut milk instead, drown in espresso! The world (or bowl) is your slippery, slimy oyster…or it will be in a few months anyway.
More breakfast ideas?
- Killer Corned Beef Hash with Oregano Hollandaise
- Veggie Frittata with Bursted Baby Heirlooms
- Kitchen Sink Quesadillas
- My Breakfast Sandwich Nightmare
- Raspberry and Pomegranate Bread Pudding
Mahalo and goodnight.
* In case you didn’t know, pregnancy is TEN MONTHS.
