My obstetrician must think I’m the looniest toon this side of the hen house.
I visited him yesterday, at nearly 39 weeks pregnant (which is nearing the 10 month mark, if you’re so inclined to do the math) and maniacally uncomfortable.
I’m being dramatic. I’m fine. My butt burns with lightening-like pains, indigestion sizzles my esophageal lining like plastic in a bonfire, the variety of hormones coursing through my veins make me feel a little (what’s the word?) – oh yes, pregnancy brain. Can’t find the right words now or likely remember to even look for them later. I should just start crying again. Reasonable.
Short of breath and short on patience I told my (hilarious and wonderfully talented) male OB that I have delved deep into the depths of the internet; scouring for any credible (or whatever) sources to help initiate spontaneous, natural labor; in anticipation that he would offer me some sound medical advice.
He chuckled and said to my husband – “There is no rush!”
If it was legal to choke someone without consequence, this might have been that moment.
Why don’t you bros go catch up over brews and I’ll just sit here rapidly expanding in swelling contention.
Pardon my crazy, but I do believe there is a bit of urgency in this situation.
I was then casually reminded that being impatient is not a factor that plays into bearing children, at least in the medical community.
I wait.
As my voice got lost in the testosterone filled room, my thoughts dwindled back to that nondescript pinterest page..Ideas laden with blogs posts about cervical ripening caused by moderate date consumption, the enzymatic component in pineapples that invoke contractions, raspberry leaf tea, sex, bouncing on balls, curb walking, etc.
And then I saw it. Eggplant babies. Many women swear by eating eggplant parmesan and for no known reason within 24-48hrs are happily on their way to canoodling a bundle of joy. There is even a restaurant in Georgia, called Scalini’s that swear their recipe induces labor.
I was intrigued. I am desperate. And noone here is listening to the tolerantly dilated lady on the table.
Fingers crossed. (Legs open) I’ll let you know what happens.
Feeds 1 very pregnant lady for 3-4 meals; Takes a laborious 1.5-2 hrs
Ingredients for Eggplant Parmesan
- 2 medium eggplants; washed, sliced in rounds, lined on paper towel and lightly salted
- 1 bulb fennel, small dice
- 2/3 sweet onion, small dice
- 2 28 oz cans cento tomatoes, blended until smooth (alternatively, you can use fresh tomatoes if they are in season)
- 1 tbsp fresh rosemary, minced
- 1 tbsp fresh oregano, minced
- 1 tbsp fresh thyme, minced
- 1/2 handful fresh basil, roughly chopped
- 2 bay leaves
- 2 tbsp dried oregano
- 5 cloves garlic, minced
- 6-8 oz whole milk mozzarella, shredded
- 8 oz comté cheese, shredded
- 4 oz parmesan, shredded
- 6 oz ricotta cheese
- 2 cups panko bread crumbs in a bowl
- 4 eggs, mixed in a bowl
- 1 cup flour in a bowl
- 1/2 cup canola oil
- 3 tbsp butter
- Good olive oil, salt and pepper
Method
While the eggplant are laying on the paper towel, salted and draining excess moisture let’s make the sauce.
In a large lipped pan sauté the onion and fennel in some olive oil with salt until translucent. Add the garlic and stir for 1 minute.
Combine the pureed tomatoes, fresh herbs and a hefty pinch of salt. Add bay leaves now too.
Bring this mixture to a simmer, stir well and then cover and turn heat to low. Allow to cook for at 30-40 min*.
After eggplant has sufficiently released moisture (about 20-30 min), begin frying them in batches.
Season the panko with salt, pepper and dried oregano.
Add a few tbsp of canola oil and butter to a sauté pan and heat. Meanwhile dip each slice into the flour, then egg, then panko. Fry for approximately 2-3 min per side and then set aside. Add more canola and butter to the pan as needed to fry the eggplant in batches.
Preheat oven to 400 degrees.
To assemble, gather a large baking dish and line the bottom with some of the tomato sauce.
Top this with one layer of fried eggplant. Top with half of the comté, half of the parm and spoon in half of the ricotta.
Do another layer just like this using the remaining sauce, eggplant, cheese.
Top the whole shebang with shredded mozzarella.
Bake, uncovered for 25-30 min, until bubbling and golden.
* Normally, I would put wine in my tomato sauce, but since this was supposed to induce labor I opted not too. If you want; 1 cup of full bodied red would be delicious. You could also use my recipe for All Day Marinara instead!
Not trying to birth another human? Just craving some divine eggplant recipes?? Try:
- Eggplant with Tarragon, Black Garlic and Cabernet
- Eggplant and Haloumi Napoleons
- Chinese Crunch Salad with Scallion Vinaigrette and Eggplant Croutons
(Note: It did not induce labor…But it was delicious)
