My mom called me screaming. I couldn’t make out all the sentences but it was something about how her sauce curdled…I asked her to reel it back in and talk sensibly.
“Alexa, my damn sauce is in the garbage…It curdled.” I replied “Ok, let’s talk through it…How did you do it? Did you temper the eggs? Did it boil?”
(Back to an ear piercing tone) “I didn’t use eggs and now my alfredo is ruined!”
“Hold on…I thought you were making carbonara?”
“I was making carbonara but I thought alfredo sauce would be good addition. AND I got a text from HIM. And yes, it boiled! And yes, it’s in the garbage.”
(You should know ‘he/him’ is one of her ex-husbands).
“Ah, well, you should try to remember that he did not boil your alfredo sauce.”
“Alexa, my rigatoni is ruined. And I’m almost completely out of wine. This day is for shit!”
“Mom, I told you to buy more than 1 bottle. Wait, rigatoni? Do you have any idea what carbonara actually is??”
Then just prior to hanging up, candidly she said, “I should have made grilled cheese. And bought the second bottle. And no…he didn’t boil my sauce – you are right. He just boils my blood.”
Anyway – in the case you are looking for a carbonara recipe – Here you go.
Takes 30 min; Feeds you and one of your ex-husbands
Ingredients
- 1 package capellini (or spaghetti)
- 10 slices of pancetta, cooked until crispy and broken into large pieces (8 slices for the pasta and 2 for snacking purposes)
- 3 egg yolks
- 1/3 cup freshly grated parmesan
- 1/3 cup heavy cream
- 2 tbsp salted butter
- 1 tbsp thyme, minced
- 1 tsp maldon salt
- 2 tsp ground black pepper
- Zest of 1 meyer lemon and juice of half
- EVOO, salt
Method
Boil the pasta in salted boiling water until done, reserving 1 cup of the pasta water.
Have a bite of pancetta.
Make the sauce. Whisk egg yolks, cream, parm, thyme, maldon, 1/2 of the pepper, and lemon zest/juice together.
Slowly add some of the hot pasta water to the sauce, whisking briskly, so as not to curdle the eggs.
Mix the sauce with the drained pasta back in the hot pot.
Plate and top with pancetta, extra parm and black pepper.
More pasta? Always!
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- Tagliatelle with Sun Dried Tomato Pesto, Hazelnuts and Burrata
- Perfect Bolognese
- Rigatoni with Chicken Sausage and Drunken Pepper Sauce
