I am in a very salty mood right now. So this is a friendly reminder to do not. I repeat. DO NOT belittle. DO NOT besmall. Nope, it’s not a word – DO NOT breed a sense of betterment above those around you.
These are true niceties to live by. Not very hard either.
Last week I was berated – by my hairdresser….after she messed up MY hair. Made me yellow…(I am a very ashy, platinum blonde) and so I politely asked if we could tone this (Tennessee orange). AND she lost her mind! Perplexed by her own mistake, it seemed a Tasmanian devil had crawled into her body, spun it in a centrifuge of convulsions and evil purged out of all her orifices. Jekyll and Hyde at her prime.
She began yelling (YELLING!?) at me…like I did this to my own head. ????
*It’s important to note that this is a one person salon, so there was no one around to witness this incredulous flabbergast, (except me; the ghasted victim.) (Again, not a word). Follow along.
She went on to scream, “It looks fine!” (*no it doesn’t.)
And, “I don’t have time to tone you with how busy I am!” (*yikes! really?)
Along with, “You are so frustrating! This happens with you every time!” (*never happened before, which I thought was obvious, based my repeated entrustment of my hair to her time after time.)
As the client, (who, mind you, was still civilized albeit very confused during this verbal beating) I sat there thinking to myself, how sad her life must be. How her existence is that terrible that she must create this euphoric, toxic drama with someone she has a surface level relationship with because she is so desperately seeking attention? I could only suppose.
I felt bad for her. And for my head.
It was a very uncomfortable place for me. My vulnerable hair follicles exposed to her demon fingers. I watched the satanic sparkles in her eyes. I needed to get out of there. And quick.
As the minutes of distinct, utter silence (after her admonition was complete) dragged on, I found myself in a quandary. I was nervous for the millions of golden locks on my head, but I was not going to play into this abomination of an event, nor would I enable her behavior. I pulled out my phone and starting smirking at memes and photos. I was contentedly distracted as my upward thumb strum and disinterested chuckles seemed unassumingly unamusing to her.
I said I would not feed off of this nonsense. I am much to hungry to eat garbage.
She washed out the 3rd toner and I walked out the door – never to return.
Mind your manners ladies and gentlemen. Take accountability. Choose the right way, not the easy way. Do not be mean.
In the meantime, let’s eat something worthy of our perseverance through adversity. In honor of all the beautiful blondes, from dishwater to golden to Elsa.
Takes about 4hrs; Feeds a lot of blondes, brunettes, red’s, baldy’s, really anyone – it’s delish
Ingredients and Method for Chili Chicken Base
- 1 5-6lb roasting chicken
- Approximately 10-12 cups water
- 1 Meyer lemon, halved
- 4 tbsp sea salt
Place chicken and water in a large Dutch oven (the water should be enough to nearly submerge the bird).
Turn to med/high heat and add the salt and juice of the lemon. Put the whole lemon in the pot as well.
Cover with the lid cracked and bring to a boil. Once it boils turn the heat down to a low simmer and cook for 2.5-3hrs, flipping the chicken 2-3 times throughout the process.
It will be falling off the bone when the time is up.
Allow to cool, and carefully remove the chicken from the pot. Set aside to shred (I just use the white meat in this recipe, but the blog dogs are all too happy for extra dark meat in their dinner). Once shredded, keep on reserves for the preparation.
Strain the broth of bones and lemon and put the strained liquid back in the pot.
Ingredients for Blonde Chili Poblano Blanco with Crispy Hominy
- 1 large poblano, diced
- 1/2 Spanish onion, diced
- 6 cloves garlic, muddled to a paste with a pinch of sea salt
- 16oz cannellini beans (in juice), divided
- 1 tbsp cornstarch
- 1/3 good ale (I used a local Blonde from Bonehaus Brewery)
- 2 tbsp sweet paprika
- 2 tsp cumin
- 2 tbsp chili powder
- 1 32oz can hominy (in juice), divided
- 1/4 tsp cinnamon
- 1 tsp dried oregano
- 1 tbsp crushed red pepper flakes
- 1 tsp white pepper
- 1/2 tbsp coriander seed, ground
- 1 container crème fraîche (8-10oz) at room temp
- 3 large glugs half and half
- 4oz canned, diced poblanos or green chilis
- 1 tbsp canola oil
- 3 cups white meat chicken you shredded (see above)
Drain half the can of hominy and pat kernels dry with paper towel. Allow to dry for 15 min.
Heat a small frying pain to medium heat and add about 1 tbsp of canola oil. Roll the hominy in the cornstarch and pat off the excess. Toss them in the pain and season with garlic powder and salt. Stir occasionally ~ they take about 10 minutes to get nice and crispy. Set aside on clean, dry paper towel.
In a large stock pot, sauté onion and poblano with olive oil and a pinch of salt ~ 3-4 min, until sweating. Add the garlic paste, cannellinis in juice and the blonde ale. Stir.
Now add the chicken, hominy, herbs and seasonings and the strained broth. Bring to a boil then turn down to a slow simmer. Cook for 1 hr.
Taste and adjust seasoning.
Once done, remove from heat and add half and half and crème fraîche. Stir and serve.
Toppings I like to use are avocado chunks, scallions, queso fresco, cilantro, chilis, and of course the crispy hominy.
Need more bowls of soul warming substance to chase away the dreary wearies? Here is: